Ihe 6 ị na-ekwesịghị ịgbanwe banyere onwe gị maka onye òtù ọlụlụ

1. Mmekọrịta gị na ezinụlọ na ndị enyi gị

Christina Wilke, bụ́ onye na-agwọ ezinụlọ na Pennsylvania na-ekwu, sị: “Ọ bụrụ na onye òtù ọlụlụ gị hụrụ gị n'anya, ha ga-agbalịsi ike iji obiọma na nkwanye ùgwù na-emeso ndị enyi gị na ndị ị hụrụ n'anya. Nke a pụtara na ọ gaghị ewe iwe ma mee ka ihu gị gbawaa n'ihi nzaghachi nye gị na ndị mụrụ gị gaa ezumike ezinụlọ dị mkpa. Ọ gaghị ekwu okwu mkparị mgbe ị na-ekwurịta nsogbu na ndụ onwe onye nke ezigbo enyi gị nwanyị.

Ọkachamara ahụ na-akọwa, sị: “Ọ bụghị naanị na ị ga-ewepụ ọbụbụenyi ruo ọtụtụ afọ ma ọ bụ gị na ndị ikwu gị na-akpachi anya ma ọ bụrụ na onye gị na ya na-akpakọrịta. "O yighịkwa ka gị na onye na-amanye gị ịhọrọ n'etiti ya na ndị ị hụrụ n'anya n'ụzọ nke gị ga-enwe mmekọrịta ntụkwasị obi."

2. Mmejọ gị

Anyị niile na-eji obere akpa batara na mmekọrịta. Onye ọ bụla nwere ntụpọ pụrụ iche nke ya nke kpụrụla ma kọwaa ndụ ya.

“A person worthy of your time and energy will find a way to love everything about you, including your imperfections,” notes Betsy Ross, a psychotherapist from Massachusetts. — Seeing only the best in a partner, ignoring his not very flattering qualities, is dangerous: not a single person in everyday life can remain impeccable in everything for a long time. At some point, it will become impossible not to notice shoes thrown in the center of the hallway, dirty dishes in the sink, or frivolous comments on any occasion. And if the other half refuses to recognize your weaknesses, sooner or later you will have conflicts.

3. Valkpụrụ

“If you want a strong relationship, never change your values,” warns divorce coach Kira Gould. — True love is based on the dialogue of people who are true to themselves. From trying to be not who you are in order to please your partner, you get tired very quickly.

Living a lie is debilitating. In particular, changing your idea of ​​the family, of decency and self-esteem, of (un)spirituality, or issues of economic security in favor of the partner’s beliefs is a dead end path that often leads to a breakdown in relationships. Most of us are close and understand the universal desire to be loved and accepted, but this need should not go to the detriment of our true «I».

4. Ihe mgbaru ọsọ ndụ

Ihe mgbaru ọsọ i nwere tupu i zute ọkara nke ọzọ ekwesịghị ịgbanwe nke ukwuu n'ihi na ị bụzi otu n'ime akụkụ nke di na nwunye ahụ.

Amy Kipp, bụ́ onye na-agwọ ọrịa ezinụlọ nke si Texas, kwuru, sị: “N'ezie, unu pụrụ iche echiche efu ọnụ ma mee atụmatụ imekọ ihe ọnụ maka ọdịnihu, ma ha ekwesịghị ịkpachapụ anya ihe mgbaru ọsọ ndụ zuru ụwa ọnụ. "Ihe mgbaru ọsọ gị kwesịrị ịdị n'otu, ọ bụghị asọmpi. Ọ bụrụ na ị na-agba mbọ maka ọrụ, onye gị na ya na-arụkọ ọrụ kwesịrị ịkwado ngwọta ndị ga-enyere gị aka n'ọrụ gị.

Ọ bụrụ na ọmụmụ ụmụaka bụ ihe ị na-arọ nrọ mgbe niile, ị gaghị ekewa na nrọ a iji mee ka onye òtù ọlụlụ gị nwee obi ụtọ. Ọ dị mkpa ka a tụlee okwu ndị dị otú ahụ dị oké mkpa ná mmalite mmekọrịta, ka onye ọ bụla wee nwee ike ịkọwa n’onwe ya ma ihe mgbaru ọsọ gị hà bụ otu.”

5. Àgwà ndị na-eme ka ị pụrụ iche

Kedu ihe ndị enyi gị na-ekwu gbasara gị mgbe ha mere ka ị mata onye nọ na gburugburu ha? Na ị na-enwere ndị ọzọ obiọma ma na-echebara ndị ọzọ echiche? Na-enweghị atụ amamihe na ọchị?

“Whatever your bright, unique qualities, do not let them fade and die out in your life together,” advises Marni Feuerman, a family therapist from Florida. — If a lot of people have recognized some trait of yours as remarkable, don’t change it just because one single person, your partner, criticizes it.

Ikekwe ọ na-ekwo gị ekworo, na-akpakọrịta na nke dị mfe, nye ndị enyi gị. Ma ọ bụ ọ na-achọsi ike ịgbakọ na ịhazi ihe niile, na ịhụnanya gị na ịhụnanya nke nnwere onwe na-akpasu ya iwe. Otu ụzọ ma ọ bụ ọzọ, ma mgbe onye òtù ọlụlụ kwenyere na ihe dị mkpa ka e "dozie" n'ime gị, were nke a dị ka ihe ịrịba ama ịdọ aka ná ntị: ọ bara uru ịnọgide na-enwe mmekọrịta dị otú ahụ ma ọlị.

6. Ọchịchọ gị

Ị na-abanye n'egwuregwu bọọlụ ma ọ bụ na-enye onyinye maka ọrụ ebere na ngwụcha izu ụka, mana n'oge na-adịbeghị anya, ị na-emewanye ihe omume ndị ahụ, na-ahọrọ ka gị na onye òtù ọlụlụ nọrọ oge. Ná mmalite nke mmekọrịta, n'oge oge nke ịhụnanya ụbọchị na ịmata ibe, mgbanwe dị otú ahụ na-ebute ụzọ bụ nnọọ ihe ebumpụta ụwa.

“It is difficult for lovers to part, even for a short time. However, don’t give up on passions by reducing life to these nascent relationships, warns Debra Campbell, a family psychologist from Melbourne. — A lover may be one of the most important people in your life, but keeping in touch with other objects of love, hobbies, sports, creative projects is a must.

Hobbies are only good for personal relationships: the joy and satisfaction that we get in doing what we love fuels passion. At such moments, we are in the best shape and therefore are especially attractive to a partner and interesting to ourselves. Never give up on what makes you happy.»