Ị dị ala - na nke a bụ isi ike gị

Who decides what our life will be like? Only ourselves! answers the Adlerian approach. Its founder, the Austrian psychologist Alfred Adler (1870–1937), spoke of the fact that everyone has a unique lifestyle that is influenced not so much by family, environment, innate characteristics, but by our «free creative power.» This means that each person transforms, interprets what happens to him — that is, he truly creates his life. And in the end, it is not the event itself that acquires meaning, but the meaning that we attach to it. A life style develops early, by the age of 6-8 years.

(Ekwela) iche echiche banyere ya

“Ụmụaka bụ ndị na-ekiri ihe nke ọma, ma ndị nsụgharị dara ogbenye,” ka ọkà n’akparamàgwà mmadụ America bụ́ Rudolph D. Dreikurs kwuru, bụ́ onye mepụtara echiche Adler n’etiti narị afọ gara aga. Nke a yiri ka ọ bụ isi iyi nke nsogbu anyị. Nwatakịrị na-elezi anya nke ọma ihe na-eme gburugburu, ma ọ bụghị mgbe niile ka ọ na-eme nkwubi okwu ziri ezi.

“Having survived the divorce of their parents, even children from the same family can come to completely different conclusions,” explains psychologist Marina Chibisova. — One child will decide: there is nothing to love me for, and I am to blame for the fact that my parents divorced. Another will notice: Relationships sometimes end, and that’s okay and not my fault. And the third will conclude: you need to fight and do so that they always reckon with me and do not leave me. And everyone goes further in life with their own conviction.

Ụfọdụ nrụnye na-ewuli elu. "Otu n'ime ụmụ akwụkwọ m kwuru na n'oge ọ bụ nwata, o ruru ná nkwubi okwu: "Ama m mma, onye ọ bụla na-amasịkwa m," ọkà n'akparamàgwà mmadụ gara n'ihu ikwu. Ebee ka o si nweta ya? Ihe kpatara ya abụghị na nna hụrụ ya n’anya ma ọ bụ onye ọ na-amabughị gwara ya banyere ya. Ụzọ Adlerian na-agọnahụ njikọ kpọmkwem n'etiti ihe ndị nne na nna na-ekwu ma na-eme na mkpebi nwa ahụ na-eme. Ma si otú ahụ na-ebelata ndị nne na nna nke ibu dị ukwuu nke ibu ọrụ onwe onye maka ihe isi ike nke uche nke nwatakịrị ahụ.

Enwere ọtụtụ mmetụta karịa onye ọ bụla, ọbụlagodi okwu ndị nne na nna siri ike. Ma mgbe àgwà ghọrọ ihe mgbochi, ekwela ka ị dozie nsogbu ndụ nke ọma, enwere ihe mere ị ga-eji gaakwuru onye ọkà n'akparamàgwà mmadụ.

Cheta ihe niile

Ọrụ n'otu n'otu na onye ahịa na ụzọ Adlerian na-amalite site na nyocha nke ndụ na ịchọ nkwenye na-ezighị ezi. Marina Chibisova na-akọwa, sị: "N'ịbụ onye lebaworo ha anya n'ụzọ zuru ezu, onye na-ahụ maka nkà mmụta uche na-enye onye ahịa nkọwa ya, na-egosi otú usoro nkwenkwe a si malite na ihe a pụrụ ime banyere ya." - Dịka ọmụmaatụ, Victoria onye ahịa m na-atụ anya ihe kacha njọ mgbe niile. Ọ kwesịrị ibu ụzọ hụ obere ihe ọ bụla, ma ọ bụrụ na ọ na-ahapụ onwe ya ka ọ zuru ike, mgbe ahụ ihe na ndụ ga-agbakasị ahụ n'ezie.

Iji nyochaa ụdị ndụ anyị, anyị na-atụgharị na ncheta mbụ. Ya mere, Victoria chetara otú ọ na-esi na-efegharị na swing n'ụbọchị mbụ nke ezumike ụlọ akwụkwọ. Obi dị ya ụtọ ma mee ọtụtụ atụmatụ maka izu a. Mgbe ahụ ọ dara, gbajie ogwe aka ya wee nọrọ otu ọnwa dum na nkedo. Ihe ncheta a nyeere m aka ịghọta echiche nke na ọ ga-abụrịrị "na-ada n'ọsọ" ma ọ bụrụ na o kwere ka ọ dọpụ uche ya ma kporie ndụ.

Iji ghọta na foto gị nke ụwa abụghị ihe ebumnobi n'obi, na nkwubi okwu nwata gị, nke nwere ihe ọzọ, nwere ike isi ike. Maka ụfọdụ, nzukọ 5-10 zuru ezu, ebe ndị ọzọ chọrọ ọnwa isii ma ọ bụ karịa, dabere na omimi nke nsogbu ahụ, ogo akụkọ ihe mere eme na mgbanwe ndị a chọrọ.

Jide onwe gị

In the next step, the client learns to observe himself. The Adlerians have a term — «catching yourself» (catching yourself). The task is to notice the moment when an erroneous belief interferes with your actions. For example, Victoria tracked situations when there was a feeling that she would “fall off the swing” again. Together with the therapist, she analyzed them and came to a new conclusion for herself: in general, events can develop in different ways, and it is not necessary to fall off the swing, most often she manages to calmly get up and move on.

So the client critically rethinks children’s conclusions and chooses a different interpretation, more adult. And then learns to act based on it. For example, Victoria learned to relax and allocate a certain amount of money to spend it on herself with pleasure, without fear that «she will fly for it.»

"N'ịmata na e nwere ọtụtụ àgwà ndị nwere ike ime ya, onye ahịa ahụ na-amụta ime ihe nke ọma," ka Marina Chibisova kwubiri.

N'etiti gbakwunyere na mwepu

From Adler’s point of view, the basis of human behavior is always a certain goal that determines its movement in life. This goal is “fictitious”, that is, based not on common sense, but on emotional, “personal” logic: for example, one should always strive to be the best. And here we recall the concept with which Adler’s theory is primarily associated — the feeling of inferiority.

Ahụmahụ nke ịdị ala bụ njirimara nke onye ọ bụla n'ime anyị, Adler kwenyere. Onye ọ bụla na-eche ihu n'eziokwu na ha amaghị otú / enweghị ihe, ma ọ bụ na ndị ọzọ na-eme ihe ka mma. Site na mmetụta a na-amụ ọchịchọ imeri na ịga nke ọma. Ajụjụ a bụ gịnị kpọmkwem ka anyị na-aghọta dị ka ndị dị ala anyị, dị ka mwepu, na ebee, na kedu ihe gbakwunyere anyị ga-akwaga? Ọ bụ isi vector nke mmegharị anyị na-adabere na ndụ anyị.

In fact, this is our answer to the question: what should I strive for? What will give me a sense of complete integrity, meaning? For one plus — to make sure that you are not noticed. For others, it is the taste of victory. For the third — a feeling of complete control. But what is perceived as a plus is not always really useful in life. The Adlerian approach helps to acquire greater freedom of movement.

Mụtakwuo

Ị nwere ike mata echiche nke Psychology Adlerian n'otu n'ime ụlọ akwụkwọ ndị Kọmitii International nke Adler Summer Schools and Institute (ICASSI) na-ahazi kwa afọ. Nke na-esote, 53rd kwa afọ Summer School ga-eme na Minsk na Julaị 2020. Gụkwuo na Online.