How to become productive without putting yourself in a tight rein

Like many people, I love productivity hacks. But here’s what confuses me: all the articles I read on this topic give military hard advice: «to be productive every morning, you must do this and that», «the most successful people in the world every day do it”, “for everything to work out, just give up everything that does not lead you to success.”

But don’t you think that everything is not so simple? What if all these successful people are successful despite their qualities, which are so valued in society, and not because of them? Do these rigid postulates they preach really help them stay productive? And even if so, does this mean that everyone else will do this way? I’m not entirely sure of this. As a psychologist, I regularly observe the side effects of this approach, the main one being constant self-criticism.

At first glance, it may seem that in the short term, a harsh inner critic is useful, but in the «running a long distance» it is harmful: because of it, we experience constant anxiety and can even sink into a state of depression. Not to mention that self-condemnation is one of the main reasons for procrastination.

But when we learn to notice the words of the inner critic in time and soften the tone of internal monologues, the mood improves, and productivity grows. All you need to do is be a little kinder to yourself.

So how do you become (and stay) productive without being too hard on yourself? Here are some key principles.

1. Clarify your goals

In our society, it is believed that we should dream big. Maybe that’s true, but modesty doesn’t hurt either. A grand goal excites, but if it is not achieved, disappointment cannot be avoided. Often the best strategy is to take small steps towards the global goal, setting intermediate goals and achieving them.

And, of course, it’s important to be honest with yourself. Are the goals you set for yourself really yours? Many of us fail to solve problems precisely because they are not important to us. Spending too much time on achieving someone else’s goals, we begin to experience dissatisfaction and anxiety. But when the goals reflect our true values, we are finally seized with calm and confidence.

2. Stick to an individual regimen

Productivity experts often advise us to stick to a certain routine, but what if it doesn’t work for us? Getting up at five in the morning, a contrast shower, an hour of work on a personal project before starting the main work … And if you are a night owl?

Instead of trying to overpower yourself, try to listen to yourself and revise your daily routine. Maybe you need to start and end your work day a little later than others. Or longer lunches, because during breaks you come up with the most outstanding ideas. These may seem like small things, but in the long run they can make a big difference in your productivity.

3. Moderate expectations

Most often, we simply do not think about them, sharing the same expectations as the people around us. But do they fit our personal needs and goals? Not at all a fact — but productivity, again, suffers.

So ask yourself: what do I really expect from work? Take your time, give yourself time to think. Someone needs to meditate to answer this question, someone needs to talk with a close friend, someone needs to write down their thoughts on paper. Once you have established your current expectations, set yourself a reminder to review them again from time to time.

4. Soften the tone of the internal dialogue

Almost all of us talk to ourselves about what is happening to us, and often hear that same inner critic who scolds and accuses us: “What an idiot you have to be to ruin everything!” or «I’m such a lazy person — because of this, all my troubles …»

The internal dialogues and the tone in which we describe what is happening affect our mood, the way we feel about ourselves, the feelings we experience, and the way we work. Scolding ourselves for misconduct and failures, we only make ourselves worse and prevent ourselves from finding a way out of the situation. Therefore, it is worth learning to treat yourself more carefully and gently.

When work stalled, Ernest Hemingway reminded himself, “Don’t worry. You could write before and you can write now.” He also noted that he always works well in the spring. This is a prime example of how you can listen to yourself, know your features and use them to work more productively.

Each of us has periods when we are less productive or simply fall into a stupor. This is fine. Productivity may go through a «winter hibernation» or a «spring bloom» period. Don’t expect spring to last forever. Learn to appreciate winter and benefit from it.

Isi mmalite: Ọkara.